"There are two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other as though everything is a miracle." Albert Einstein
Well here it is, about 10 days until Christmas. The halls are decked, the tree is up, everyone is looking forward to the big day. This year is very special as it is our first Christmas back in Michigan in 7 years. We can't begin to tell you how great it is to be back home. We bought a live tree, a blue spruce, never had one of those before, and it looks terrific in our living room. Sam wanted to have Christmas at our house, so that is what we are doing. It will be a little crowded but I don't think anyone will mind. The Grand kids came over and we decorated the tree and had KFC for dinner. A good time was had by all.
My joy is tempered by the reality of Sam's health. I want everything to be just the way Sam would like it for the holiday and I want to remember every detail of the day. We no longer look at the future in terms of years, it is now months. But we try to remain optimistic, who knows, we have witnessed many miracles in the last two years, maybe we can eek out one more.
The biggest miracle of late was after his motorcycle accident in October. He laid the bike down to avoid hitting another car and bruised his right lung (the bad one), broke three ribs and punctured said lung. His condition was dire and the trauma docs were very pessimistic about his chances of leaving the hospital. There was talk of a ventilator and they said once on it he probably wouldn't come off. He was using oxygen at such a high rate to keep his levels up, that if his numbers continued to drop he would need the ventilator. He worked really hard at his breathing exercises which built up his lung capacity. We were told that we were out of the woods and we couldn't believe it. He was still very oxygen dependent so when his numbers started down again, the docs sent in a Palliative care doc who talked to us about the big V again and nursing homes, and hospice. Good Lord is this really happening again? So after speaking to Dr. Kavenaugh about Hospice, we were sent home with oxygen and when go home we signed up for hospice. After three days, Sam was no longer oxygen dependent and he was discharged from hospice care. Fast forward to week of December 19th. This just in: "Ginger" Sam's kidney has decided to go into reject mode. We actually thought we would get through November and December without a trip to the hospital. No such luck. He had to start dialysis immediately, so he was admitted to the hospital on Monday. Wednesday of that week on my way home from the hospital, the car decided to have transmission problems. Many times I thanked God I was in Kalamazoo, not Chicago when all this was taking place. I have my Son here to help me out. So here is what might be considered miraculous in this latest development. Now that Sam's kidney function is compromised, he may be eligible for some clinical trials for his cancer. Worst case scenario he can have much stronger chemotherapy that they had to avoid due to his transplanted kidney.
I hear Christmas always comes whether you're ready or not. Well it came, I only had one melt-down when I couldn't find the good silverware. With our family all around us, we dined, talked and laughed our way through the special day. We have the most marvelous Family for which we thank God everyday and if he happens to bless us with another miracle,. well that wouldn't be so bad either.
